Socially inept, in my own little way

One thing I've thought about and wished that I had was a stunning voice. If there is any talent in the arts I have, it's definitely visual art, but it seems a social thing to have a good voice.

When that catchy song plays in the car, you want to be having a good time boppin' and singing along, not croonin' with no tunin' :P Or what if you're sharing thoughts on particular bands or songs? You'd want to hum or provide decent-quality samples for others to hear and relate to, not "oh, er, the lyrics go like this, but I can't seem to hum the tune correct enough to save my life."

You can dazzle people with your mad art skills now and then, but it doesn't last long. For relatively big projects, when you're the only one with a decent eye for the visually creative, it's a good thing to be artistically capable. But it doesn't often serve you well on an everyday basis.

I think it'd just be useful, less embarrassing, and more fun to have a decent voice to boot, not to mention audibly pleasing. Then again, this is saturated with bits of insecurity; don't mind it :P

Oh, in further thought, knowing how to move on a groove streak would be another nice addition. I've never tried socially dancing before; I admit to fear anything like a ball or prom. :P

Relative conclusions to current thoughts

I am unfortunate to be rather ambitious. The insult to injury is that I'm not often "successful" enough to myself in my ambitions, and furthermore, I'm just...simply complicated for my own good. (oo, another pair of words, worthy of being a MSN s/n) I want to do so many things. Be a virtuoso at guitar, drums, piano. Play tennis, soccer, fencing, and practice martial arts well. Be a complete nerd at computer electronics. Be in a band. Create an extensive portfolio of explosively creative art. Be witty. Be deeply intellectual, yet balanced with a good dose of humility. Have a very intellectual and witty blog. Alas, these thoughts sit in the back of my mind being only wishes.

Release

Today, I sit here unemployed.

Well, not really. My next and last paycheck for my store associate job comes two week from now, and I'm starting a Toshiba rep May 5th, but as of 12:17 am, Saturday the 29th, I am unemployed.

Feels good to be free from retail.

a smile to the face

It's always rather moving when you see the baptism of an adult. They've made the extra, conscious effort of choosing to be part of a truly universal Church. Easter Vigil Mass welcomed three of such people. It was lovely.

A life.

It's quite cliche by now, the phrase: "I need a life."

A good healthy balance of daily activities, prayer- no, let's prioritise that listing- Prayer, other daily activities, study, work, and rest is what I really need. It has recently been a challenge of mine to respond to interested persons of late, namely males. At least one friend of mine seems to get the hint, no matter what his own personal, social imperfections are, but the others...let's just say, they seem to lack tact.

Sounds confusing, the way I put it, but this is my blog so I can do whatever I want. I've yet to get over this current hurdle of mine; it's going to take till July to finally stumble over it completely, here's hoping. These distractions aren't helping me one bit. When I thought I could just get over my own internal distractions, external ones are revealed- /sigh. No rest for the weary. Lord, help me through this one.

On the spiritual front, all is not so well, at least to me. I'm not satisfied with my Lenten mission, but I wonder if God is looking down at me and thinking I can and should step up my spiritual work a bit, or if He's merely helping me along with my babysteps and loving that I'm somewhat trying (despite, shamefully, my laziness). Holy Week is in three days- for once, I'm looking forward to it.

I've started taking up tennis again, but I like playing in the evenings. Problem is, I get off at 9:30pm, and I like to study a bit after work, but it takes me a good 45min-1hr of getting into efficient study-mode. Tennis takes up about an hour. So if I finish by 10:30 or so, 30 till midnight is when I'll get into that study groove. Unfortunately today, I work and my Saturday is virtually non-existent with working at 10. I guess I'll have to shave off some of that lovely 8-hr sleep if I do decide to hit the courts.

Study calls forth; I must depart.